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Conscious Inklings Blog. IDEAS, INSIGHTS & INK-SPIRATION. / empowerment

Are You Pretending? Take This Test.

Are You Pretending? Take This Test.

As humans, we do a lot of pretending.

A lot. A lot.

We may pretend that small talk is interesting. We may pretend a problem isn't really a problem. We may pretend that we're not truly responsible for the state of our lives.

If life was an acting class, we'd all get "A's"!

But when we "pretend", we live in a fake world, a world that doesn't exist.  And we can't change anything in a world that doesn't exist.

And we wonder why things stay the same.

It's kinda funny, in a predominantly materialistic world, where possessions are lauded, we humans, really don't want to "own" anything! Well, anything that requires our responsibility, our accountability. 

Of course, it's understandable. For the most part, we've been living in a world that equates responsibility with blame, and shame.

We don't want to posses anything that could land us in hot water.

But here's the problem of shunning ownership of a situation in our lives: If we don't own something, we have no power over it.

It's worth repeating. If we don't own it, we have no power over it.

Quite literally, too. We have no control over something we don't own. We can't paint a car with pink polka dots, if we don't own that car. But if we own that car, we can change it, modify it, improve it, anyway we like. Fun times.

The same applies to anything we're willing to own...a challenging relationship, an unsatisfying job, our self-defeating behaviors.

When we take personal responsibility for everything in our lives, the first thing we may notice is that...it's freeing! The opposite of what we may have thought.

The truth is light, very, very light.

The next thing that we may notice is that...we feel energized! Pretending, hiding, posturing are all very heavy, draining energies.

So, here's the invitation: Own some situation in your life you've been afraid to acknowledge.

It can just be to acknowledge it to yourself to start. Try it on. Own it. Then if you're feeling brave, say it out loud. Sing it. Dance with it. More brave? Share it with a friend? Even more brave? Share it with a person that is directly involved with your newly acknowledged truth.

Then implement wonder.

Get curious about how you may have been subconsciously attracting the situation. How do those energies feel familiar? Where did you learn these behaviors?

Then implement compassion, for yourself, and everyone involved.

Once you're ready, ask yourself what actions and behaviors would set yourself up to receive what you truly desire. What actions and behaviors would reflect your authentic self, as opposed to your wounded, subconscious self?


Let those sink in.

Make a commitment to these new self-loving, authentic actions and behaviors.

And if you falter, give yourself a break. Simply re-commit.

Be gentle. Yet, move forward. One step at a time.

Courage, dear heart.


Frank Gjata

Founder, Conscious Ink


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Behind the Ink: Realize Your Beauty.

Behind the Ink: Realize Your Beauty.

Stacey Lorin Merkl, Founder & Executive Director of Realize Your Beauty, reached out to Conscious Ink for her nonprofit’s New York City event when she realized that her own mission and that of Conscious Ink were perfectly aligned. “Realize Your Beauty is all about youth empowerment and Conscious Ink is all about empowering people with their tattoos. The messages of positivity, working to empower others, and helping them to believe in themselves - though we do this work in very different ways, at the end of the day, we have that strong commonality.” The event was a wonderful success and as the pictures poured in, we knew we had to feature Stacey, her organization, this event and her mission. This is her story of outreach and impact.

  • How was Realize Your Beauty Born? 
  • At a young age, I fell in love with theatre arts, and I knew that in some capacity they would be a part of my professional life. When I was about 14 yrs old, I had a mentor who used theater/music as a means to help those infected with or affected by HIV/AIDS. When I was 15, I began performing with his organization, helping with the fundraisers, and so on. It was this experience that taught me I could use what skills I had in theater arts as a means to help others. For me, that realization changed everything.

    After years of struggling with my own serious body image and eating disorder issues, it became clear to me that I wanted to spend my life empowering young people to feel good about themselves, to see their value and truly to understand their worth. With my background and skill set, using theatre as a means for social change was the natural path for me. For all these reasons, in 2010, I founded the non-profit organization, Realize Your Beauty, with the mission of promoting positive body image and eating disorder awareness to children and adolescents through theatre arts.  

  • What was the event that Conscious Ink sponsored all about and what inspired you to create it?
  • Conscious Ink so generously sponsored our annual event, Realize Your Beauty Day, which is an International celebration of inner-beauty, kindness and self-esteem: a day to celebrate what makes you uniquely beautiful. Conscious Ink sponsored our NYC Celebration, which was the main event for the organization. The event was so much more than what we could have hoped for! We had people of all ages in attendance: high school groups, parents and grandparents with young children, Girl Scout Troops - everyone was smiling and enjoying the activities! We had jewelry making, face-painting, a juggler, live music, live theatre performances, crafts, activities, and even a ‘Tattoo Parlor’ (sponsored by Conscious Ink!). All of the activities had a common theme: inner-beauty and kindness. The space was very generously sponsored by BALANCE Eating Disorder Treatment Center, and we were so lucky to have Denise Bidot (Plus Sized Model, Activist and Founder of No Wrong Way Movement) as our Guest Speaker. Everyone was so supportive and engaged with the presentation, and Denise Bidot gave a wonderful speech. It really helped the whole day come together, and reinforced the message behind the day: a day to celebrate what makes you uniquely you!

  • If you could tell the world one thing, what would it be?
  • If I could tell the world one thing, it would be that we are the most beautiful when we are the most ourselves. Be yourself, let yourself just…be you. You bring something to this world that nobody else can, because there is nobody in this world just like you. That seems so overly simple and maybe even trite- but it’s the truth. We all have different life experiences, along with our natural personalities and strengths, that combine to make us unique individuals. And we all have something positive we can share and contribute to this world – and the word desperately needs more positive contributions! The beautiful thing is that the more you’re able to love and embrace who you are, the more you’re able to love and embrace others.


    Conscious Ink was honored to contribute to the Realize Your Beauty event. When Frank Gjata founded Conscious Ink, he wanted the simplicity of a Manifestation Tattoo to have lasting impact by using the power of words as a regular reminder of our power. Stacey shared her own thoughts on the power of words and they perfectly reflect the heart of Conscious Ink: “I think many people underestimate the power of their words. Words inspire us, they influence us, they help to shape the way we think. A positive mantra can have a very powerful effect on our day to day lives, by helping and teaching our brains to think of things in a positive way. Words have power, and the way we speak to ourselves on a day to day basis has a very strong impact on how we feel about ourselves. It’s time to learn to speak to ourselves with words of love, respect and kindness, and a positive mantra is a great place to start.”


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