Believe It. Or Not?!
"Pardon me, would you happen to have a delicious belief I can borrow?”
Ever notice how the majority of the people in our lives have some very different experiences? Some get parking tickets. Others don’t. Some get charged bank fees. Others don’t. Some seem to experience a charmed life, while others seem to go through some kind of daily living hell.
So what’s the deal?? What makes the difference?
Great questions! Most of us typically get so caught up in our dramas that we can’t break away for a moment to ask these very important types of questions, “Why am I experiencing the reality I’m experiencing?" And, perhaps equally important, “Why is my reality different than others?"
Most of us understand that the reality we experience stems from the beliefs we have. And, of course, we develop our beliefs from the experiences we have. And, around and around, we go.
So how do we break this vicious cycle of our unpleasant experiences/reality?
Well, first, identify one of your most recurring unpleasant experiences. (Name something you complain about. That’s an easy way to discover one.) Perhaps, it’s something like, “People never listen to me!”. You, similar to most people, may have more than one type of unpleasant experience, but let’s stick with one for now.
Which unpleasant experience came up first for you? Perfect. Use that one as an example.
Now, before you start defending your experience, relax. There’s no need to defend your experience. In fact, completely own it…”Nobody listens to you.” Got it. No need to argue with that. Why? Because it’s most likely very true…you actually do have recurring experiences of people not listening to you. (Of course, we can also develop “selective” perception, when we experience things that aren’t actually there. But that’s a story for another day.)
So for now, go ahead and bask in your validation!
Okay, once you’re done basking, let’s move on to the next step. Identify someone that doesn’t have your experience. In fact, perhaps, they have the opposite experience…people always listen to them. Can you think of someone who might have the opposite experience as you?
Now take that in for a moment. You both live on the same planet. But are having completely different experiences. You are each experiencing a different reality!
That's because there’s not just ONE reality. There are as many realities as there are people. Since there are no two people exactly alike with the exact same experiences, there are also no two exact same realities. At the current count at this moment, that would make about 8 Billion unique realities! The realities of all these people match their beliefs.
That’s right, certain realities match together with certain beliefs. Now here’s a key point: Realities don’t match with people randomly or indiscriminately. Or because certain people are “bad” or weak. Or because they deserved to be punished. Or anything else our imagination can conjure up.
Realities only match up with beliefs (and states of energy). Realities match up with beliefs, not people. Repeat this until it sinks in. Realities match up with beliefs, not people. Realities match up with beliefs, not people. Realities match up with beliefs, not people. Realities match up with beliefs, not people. Realities match up with beliefs, not people. Realities match up with beliefs, not people.
So, in actuality, beliefs and realities are interchangeable among people. Anyone holding a certain belief (and state of being) will create and experience a certain reality. So, to change the experience of a certain reality, we have to change the belief that supports it.
Go ahead and Identify the belief that supports your unpleasant experience/reality. For someone that is never listened to, the underlying belief may be, “I don’t deserve to be heard.” Or, “It’s unsafe to be heard or seen.”
Then become aware of the actions and behaviors you may not notice you do before you experience your reality. In the case of the person who is never heard, she may speak very quietly, mumble, or always place attention on the other person, listening to them, and not even give the other person a chance to hear them. Then, she will once again create an experience of not being heard! And reaffirm the belief, and complain about the fact, that “Nobody ever listens to me!”
See how that works?
Now you try. See what actions and behaviors you may be doing, and the energy you may be holding before you experience what you experience. Remember, you might not even be aware of what you do. So, delve deep. Look very closely. Ask a friend what they notice about you.
Now here comes the fun part. Try on some new beliefs! Ones that really excite you. Borrow a friend’s. Or an archetype you admire.
New beliefs might be, “People love listening to me.” “I’m always heard wherever I go”. It’s safe, and fulfilling, to be heard and seen.” I am worthy of being heard". Just play. Try them on. Have fun. Go out in the world with these new beliefs!
Then ask yourself what actions and behaviors would garner those results. Or notice how someone acts and behaves that has the experiences you’d also like to enjoy.
If stating a new belief creates anxiety within you. Or just feels too farfetched. Change the language. Instead of “People love listening to me.” Say something that is actually true right now. It might be something like, “I love being heard." "I love feeling safe." "I love feeling worthy.” Do you see the difference there? You can’t argue with those. Those are things you really feel. So go for it...really own these truths. This is another way to invite the actions and behaviors that support your desires.
Remember, loosen the grip of your old self-defeating beliefs by realizing that they are interchangeable. What experiences would you like to be having? And what would you have to believe to experience them?
And next time, you run across someone that is having the kinds of experiences you’d also like to enjoy, just say…”Pardon me, would you happen to have a delicious belief I can borrow?"
Happy manifesting to you!
Frank Gjata, Founder