Conscious Inklings Blog. IDEAS, INSIGHTS & INK-SPIRATION.

4 Steps To A Softer Surrender.

A Dance Of Doing And Being.

Every goal requires a dance of doing and being. There are steps you must take to bring forth a vision, but there comes a point where action alone won’t help you realize this goal.

Picture your end goal as a remote cabin nestled in a picturesque mountain village only accessible via helicopter. It is through surrender that you let go and catch a flight when your feet can carry you no farther.

The biggest obstacle to surrender is fear. This protective part of yourself needs to be sure that if it lets go, you will be okay. The following steps show you how to work with fear and anxiety so you can ease into a softer surrender.

Get to the root of any lingering fears.

Fears’ sole job is to keep you alive. Because fear takes this job seriously – thankfully! – it has a hard time letting go. To surrender, then, you will need to work through any lingering fears.

The following journal prompts will help you understand where fear is coming from and give this part of yourself what it needs to feel safe:

How old does this fearful part of myself feel?
What was fear protecting me from in the past?
What is fear protecting me from today?
How is my current situation like this past experience? How is it different?
What does fear need from me to feel safe in this situation?
What is one small thing I can do to support fear?

After working through these prompts, take a moment to acknowledge your fear, and thank it for protecting you.

2. Tend to what is within your control.

Now that we have touched base with fear, it is time to get acquainted with fears’ sister, anxiety.

As uncomfortable as it can feel, anxiety serves a purpose, which is to drive you into action. You can use this anxious energy to your advantage by giving it a job. This reduces worry over things beyond your control and allows you to funnel anxiety into purposeful action.

On a fresh page in your journal, draw a large circle. Within this circle, write down everything that you can control. This is your sphere of influence, and your anxiety’s new job. Pour any anxious energy into completing the tasks in this circle. If there are a lot of tasks in this circle, create a plan to work through each action over a longer period of time.

Outside of the circle, jot down everything beyond your control. These are the elements that you can surrender to.

3. Look for evidence of things working out in your favor.

We will now return to fear to reassure this part of yourself that it is safe to let go.

In your journal, reflect upon prior times of uncertainty where things worked out in your favor.

Here are a few prompts to get you started:

List 3 instances where you took a leap of faith, and everything worked out in your favor.
How is this current-day situation similar?
What is the best-case scenario for this situation?

Surrender requires trust. This exercise uses evidence of prior positive experiences to boost your trust muscle and infuse you with a sense of possibility.

4. Tune into joy.

Now the heavy lifting is over – you have made friends with fear, taken care of what is within your control, and tapped your memory bank for proof that it is safe to let go. You have traveled as far as you can by action alone. Now is the time to catch a flight and kick back the rest of the way.

Give yourself as much time as you can muster – this can be anywhere from 5 minutes to an hour or even a full afternoon. During this time, allow yourself to get lost in an activity that brings you joy and connects you to something larger than yourself – wander in the woods, splash paint onto a canvas, meditate, pray, listen to music, dance, etc. The possibilities are endless, choose what excites you.

Let go of any timelines and allow yourself to be divinely taken care of. As though you have placed an order at a cliffside European restaurant, where the air is salty, obligations are few, and meals are long, leisurely excursions. Your entrée will come when it’s ready, and you are in no rush, because you are enjoying yourself and know the food will be well worth the wait.

Fear is ultimately here to protect you. By working with this part of yourself, as you did in the steps above, you pave the way for a softer surrender.

~Amanda Brown

Amanda Brown

Love Is Sticky.

(Two Tips To Make New Commitments Stick.)

Greetings lovely peeps!

See below a couple suggestions to support and activate your intentions, any time of the year, and make them stick (no pun intended.)

TIP 1.) One vital step in materializing any new commitment is interrupting our old subconscious patterning. Meaning... things are all fine and dandy when we feel grounded, present in the moment, day dreaming about our desires, gratitude journaling, reading something inspirational, sipping green tea, etc. However, all bets are off once we fall back into our old habits and behavioral patterns.

This is exactly why Conscious Ink was created in the first place. To remind us about our intentions and commitments at times when we'd otherwise FORGET.

Couldn’t we really use reminders plastered all over our forehead?!

Well, perhaps, but one of our Manifestation Tattoos on the wrist would be a good start :-).

Set yourself up for success. Be sure to surround yourself with things and activities that will interrupt old patterns, along with people that will support your commitments.

TIP 2.) If just the idea of making New Year's resolutions gives you anxiety, perhaps try making a SINGLE commitment to a a powerful process instead of drafting up a long list of goals or desired outcomes.

One process commitment that will support all others: SELF LOVE!

Loving ourselves is the most effective action we can take…by leaps and bounds.

Commit to the process of self love, whatever that may look like to you. When we commit to loving ourselves in the moment over and over again, it will, paradoxically, lead to the most amazing, even unimaginable outcomes!

But do get clear on what truly feels loving to YOU. Don’t just rely on preconceived notions you may have. Really feel into it.

So when is the best time to love yourself? Right NOW, of course.

Here's to loving ourselves!

Frank GjataFounder, Conscious Ink

Frank Gjata

Stock Up On Self Care.

(2 Ways To Serve Up Self Awareness This Holiday.)

The holidays can be the most wonderful time of the year, but they can also be the most stressful.

So, it’s a good idea to be prepared…and to be proactive with our self care.

2 Ways to Serve Up Self Awareness this Holiday!

1) Know Thy Self: Take a moment to survey yourself about what exactly stresses you out most during the holidays. Then, come up with some ways you can support yourself in those situations. For example, if you know you have a tendency to do too much, and are uncomfortable with asking for help in those moment, plan ahead. Let one of your trusted friends, or family members, in on your insight, and ask them if they’d be willing to support you in whatever suits you best. Don’t be afraid to be specific with your requests. Everyone appreciates clarity. And the key is to ask for the kind of support you’d like BEFOREHAND...when things are calm...and not wait until the day of the event when you may already have lost your balance, or your mind😳.

2) Know Thy Family And Friends: If year after year, you’ve noticed certain unsettling patterns happen between you, family members and/or friends, once again, identify those things beforehand. Come up with a plan with some options of how you could take care of yourself in those moments. Do you have some ideas of what those things might look like? Sometimes, it’s helpful to brainstorm with friends, as we may be blinded to opportunities that we would have never thought of ourselves.

It’s amazing how big of an impact a little preparation can have.

As most of us have heard by now, Einstein’s famous quote: “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.” So, let’s not fall for the same ol’ insanity. Let’s do something different this year. Let’s be prepared. Let’s plan ahead. Let’s identify, and initiate, some new action steps that would support an outcome that truly would feel wonderful.

Wishing you a merry, safe, and sane, holiday!

Cheers!

Frank Gjata
Founder, Conscious Ink

Amanda Brown

A Month Of Gratitude

November is officially upon us, and with November comes button-popping holiday feasts and the giving of thanks. There could not be a better time to center in on gratitude. The outer world that you experience is a direct reflection of your inner reality. When you carry with you an attitude of gratitude, you begin to experience the world through a new lens.

This is why we would like to challenge you to make gratitude a daily part of your life for the rest of the month of November. This challenge will incorporate a brief gratitude practice into your morning, afternoon traffic and evening routines. Overall it will take about 10 minutes each day to employ.

Gratitude challenge

Morning: First thing upon waking up in the morning take a moment to set an intention to focus on gratitude throughout the day. As simple as this is, the act of setting an intention will shift your outlook as you will be actively searching for ways to feel grateful in each moment.

Afternoon: Often times we find ourselves burning time waiting in traffic or long lines as we move from point A to point B. While this waiting time can feel like a burden in the moment, these instances actually provide us with great opportunities to practice gratitude. Next time you are waiting at a stoplight, run a mental inventory of everything that you are grateful for. This list can include items as small as the morning dew droplets forming on your window. The contents of your list are irrelevant as long as they allow you to fully step into the feeling of gratitude.

Evening: Each night put aside a couple of minutes to jot down a list of three moments that made you feel grateful that day. Writing down these moments trains you to see the silver lining in every situation. Even the worst of days come with gems of their own.

My experience

Throughout the month of October I decided to make gratitude a part of my everyday life. I began by pressing a "Gratitude" Manifestation Tattoo into my wrist and following the daily gratitude practice outlined above.

Honing in on gratitude for a month trained me to search for the beauty happening around me in any given moment- the elderly woman beaming as she watched two young children play in the grass, mustard yellow leaves falling from the branches of a maple tree, a man pulling to the corner of the road to take a picture of that picturesque fall scenery from his car window. As I moved through the month, I became attuned to these indelible moments taking place in the most mundane aspects of day to day life. I also began to see time spent waiting in traffic as a prime opportunity to practice gratitude. Rather than mulling over my impending lateness, I admired fall colors and found an appreciation for the warmth of a matcha latte in my hand.

Setting a conscious intention to focus on gratitude and having a "grateful" Manifestation Tattoo pressed into my wrist as a visual reminder of this intention steered my attention away from everything that wasn't to my liking and helped me to see the many things that were right with a given situation. This shift in perspective was subtle, meaning that it may not have been immediately recognizable to an onlooker, yet it was powerful in the way that it anchored me in the beautiful simplicity of the present moment.

If you have been looking to make positive changes in your life, it is important to remember that change begins from within. Incorporating a daily gratitude practice into your life will help you create a positive internal world that will lay down a powerful foundation for any goals that you would like to bring to fruition.

We would love to hear about your experience if you do give this gratitude challenge a whirl. Let us know about any shifts that you noticed in your day-day life via the comment section, Facebook or Instagram.

Best wishes to you on your gratitude journey!

Amanda,

Conscious Ink Staffer

Conscious Ink

"Halloween Is Over. So Why Do I Still Choose To Wear A Mask?"

It's time to take off the mask.

Frank (founder of Conscious Ink) and I were talking the other day. I was sharing with him how I participated in the T-Rex (blow-up costume) Stampede that happens at the end of October every year in downtown Nashville. I was telling him how fun it was and how goofy we all were and so carefree. He brought up how it can be so freeing to hide behind a mask (of sort) and be your most free and authentic self in moments.

I'm sure many of you can relate.

But what keeps us, including myself on occasion, from acting so beautifully and joyfully carefree without the protection of a mask?

Something to sit with. What are we soooo scared of?

Will you join me in making a conscious commitment to let go of whatever it is that makes you feel like you can't always be who you truly are? Let's set ourselves free of that belief, that gets in the way of us showing up authentically. Let's instead, give ourselves permission to be the unique, quirky, amazing, flawed, unpredictable, weird, and goofy walking miracles we were uniquely and purposefully made to be!

No scary tricks. Just one big treat 😀

Amanda Brown

Believe It. Or Not?!

"Pardon me, would you happen to have a delicious belief I can borrow?”

Ever notice how the majority of the people in our lives have some very different experiences? Some get parking tickets. Others don’t. Some get charged bank fees. Others don’t. Some seem to experience a charmed life, while others seem to go through some kind of daily living hell.

So what’s the deal?? What makes the difference?

Great questions! Most of us typically get so caught up in our dramas that we can’t break away for a moment to ask these very important types of questions, “Why am I experiencing the reality I’m experiencing?" And, perhaps equally important, “Why is my reality different than others?"

Hmmmm...

Most of us understand that the reality we experience stems from the beliefs we have. And, of course, we develop our beliefs from the experiences we have. And, around and around, we go.

So how do we break this vicious cycle of our unpleasant experiences/reality?

Well, first, identify one of your most recurring unpleasant experiences. (Name something you complain about. That’s an easy way to discover one.) Perhaps, it’s something like, “People never listen to me!”. You, similar to most people, may have more than one type of unpleasant experience, but let’s stick with one for now.

Which unpleasant experience came up first for you? Perfect. Use that one as an example.

Now, before you start defending your experience, relax. There’s no need to defend your experience. In fact, completely own it…”Nobody listens to you.” Got it. No need to argue with that. Why? Because it’s most likely very true…you actually do have recurring experiences of people not listening to you. (Of course, we can also develop “selective” perception, when we experience things that aren’t actually there. But that’s a story for another day.)

So for now, go ahead and bask in your validation!

Okay, once you’re done basking, let’s move on to the next step. Identify someone that doesn’t have your experience. In fact, perhaps, they have the opposite experience…people always listen to them. Can you think of someone who might have the opposite experience as you?

Now take that in for a moment. You both live on the same planet. But are having completely different experiences. You are each experiencing a different reality!

That's because there’s not just ONE reality. There are as many realities as there are people. Since there are no two people exactly alike with the exact same experiences, there are also no two exact same realities. At the current count at this moment, that would make about 8 Billion unique realities! The realities of all these people match their beliefs.

That’s right, certain realities match together with certain beliefs. Now here’s a key point: Realities don’t match with people randomly or indiscriminately. Or because certain people are “bad” or weak. Or because they deserved to be punished. Or anything else our imagination can conjure up.

Realities only match up with beliefs (and states of energy). Realities match up with beliefs, not people. Repeat this until it sinks in. Realities match up with beliefs, not people. Realities match up with beliefs, not people. Realities match up with beliefs, not people. Realities match up with beliefs, not people. Realities match up with beliefs, not people. Realities match up with beliefs, not people.

So, in actuality, beliefs and realities are interchangeable among people. Anyone holding a certain belief (and state of being) will create and experience a certain reality. So, to change the experience of a certain reality, we have to change the belief that supports it.

Go ahead and Identify the belief that supports your unpleasant experience/reality. For someone that is never listened to, the underlying belief may be, “I don’t deserve to be heard.” Or, “It’s unsafe to be heard or seen.”

Then become aware of the actions and behaviors you may not notice you do before you experience your reality. In the case of the person who is never heard, she may speak very quietly, mumble, or always place attention on the other person, listening to them, and not even give the other person a chance to hear them. Then, she will once again create an experience of not being heard! And reaffirm the belief, and complain about the fact, that “Nobody ever listens to me!”

See how that works?

Now you try. See what actions and behaviors you may be doing, and the energy you may be holding before you experience what you experience. Remember, you might not even be aware of what you do. So, delve deep. Look very closely. Ask a friend what they notice about you.

Now here comes the fun part. Try on some new beliefs! Ones that really excite you. Borrow a friend’s. Or an archetype you admire.

New beliefs might be, “People love listening to me.” “I’m always heard wherever I go”. It’s safe, and fulfilling, to be heard and seen.” I am worthy of being heard". Just play. Try them on. Have fun. Go out in the world with these new beliefs!

Then ask yourself what actions and behaviors would garner those results. Or notice how someone acts and behaves that has the experiences you’d also like to enjoy.

If stating a new belief creates anxiety within you. Or just feels too farfetched. Change the language. Instead of “People love listening to me.” Say something that is actually true right now. It might be something like, “I love being heard." "I love feeling safe." "I love feeling worthy.” Do you see the difference there? You can’t argue with those. Those are things you really feel. So go for it...really own these truths. This is another way to invite the actions and behaviors that support your desires.

Remember, loosen the grip of your old self-defeating beliefs by realizing that they are interchangeable. What experiences would you like to be having? And what would you have to believe to experience them?

And next time, you run across someone that is having the kinds of experiences you’d also like to enjoy, just say…”Pardon me, would you happen to have a delicious belief I can borrow?"

Happy manifesting to you!

Frank Gjata, Founder

Frank Gjata

Dropping Shame

By Amanda Brown

Wizard of Wizardry at Conscious Ink

If a perfect person doesn't exist, and mistakes are how we grow and learn, how did we get to this place where our world is so full of shame?

I'm not sure if that question is solvable, to be honest. But. what I am sure of is that we all deserve to drop that burden of shame and walk lighter on this journey.

So how do we do that?

1.) Identify the source of the shame. Where does our shame stem from? Personal insecurities? Secrets? Mistakes and/or perceived flaws? These can all trigger shame responses, causing us to become extremely self-conscious, self-critical, and embarrassed.

2.) Acceptance. Accept that we are not perfect and neither is anyone else. Mistakes do not define us and in fact, it's just how we DO life. We mess up to learn.

3.) Challenge our thoughts. Are they true? Are we inadequate? Are we stupid? If we are all imperfect, on this magical rock floating through space, why are we allowing ourselves to feel less than others?

4.) Forgive Ourselves. We are all doing the best we can with what we have. Forgiving ourselves for mistakes should be as normalized as breathing. We are human and are fumbling through this whole experience.

5.) Start acknowledging our value. Find the value in our contributions, our thoughts, our presence, and surround ourselves with those that value us and don't break us down. Picking up a hobby or some activity to help build your confidence will help as well.

WE ARE ENOUGH...

MORE THAN ENOUGH.

Amanda Brown

2 Powerful Affirmation Hacks

If you love affirmations, and find them helpful, great!

If saying affirmations feels awkward, or you have not found them effective, you’re not alone.

One reason that affirmations may not feel right is because you actually do not believe the affirmation. The affirmation is in conflict with a belief you have, so it doesn’t resonate within you at all.

For example, you may have the following affirmation, “I am healthy.”

But if you feel, and believe, that you are unhealthy, your affirmation is in conflict with your belief.

So, what is one supposed to do?

AFFIRMATION HACK #1

The first Affirmation hack I can offer is instead of using an affirmation that doesn't resonate with you, come up with an affirmation that you actually DO believe, and that resonates deep within you.

So, to begin with, you may adjust your affirmation to something that really rings true...perhaps something like, “I love feeling healthy!” Has there been a time in your life when you did feel healthy, and it felt really good? If so, start there... because it’s actually true.

Say to yourself, “I love feeling healthy!” How does that feel?

Think about those times you felt healthy. Get in touch with those feelings. Walk around, move your body, perhaps even dance as you speak, or sing, your affirmation/truth, “I love feeling healthy!”. Notice how that feels in your body.

When you feel into your joy about feeling healthy, ask your body what actions and behaviors support you feeling healthy. Ask your body what it really wants and needs. You might be surprised at the answers that come to you.

Then, any time you may be feeling down, get back in touch with your affirmation that feels good to connect with!

AFFIRMATION HACK #2

If you have an affirmation that doesn’t ring true right off the bat...let’s say the affirmation is, “I am beautiful”, and you uncover a belief that doesn't support that affirmation, you can question the actual belief itself.

Where did you get this idea that you are not beautiful? From a parent? A friend? Society, at large? You can explore what your idea of beauty is, and where it came from. Do you have a belief that being beautiful is only physical? If so, you can question that idea, or any other notion that came up for you. Do you know anyone you find beautiful that may not be society’s idea of beauty? Well, if you find that person beautiful, can you shift your perspective and uncover the many different ways that you are indeed beautiful?

Another shift in perspective you can try is to look deeper beyond the surface…to the depths of your soul, in fact. Can you get in touch with your soul, and feel into how beautiful you are from a soul perspective?

If you’ve been successful at changing your belief, and are now able to see the many different ways you are beautiful, then the affirmation of “I am beautiful” will now resonate with you. And you can really feel into, and enjoy, that affirmation, as it is. I invite you to declare your affirmation out loud, as you move your body in fun, feel-good ways.

I hope you enjoyed these affirmation hacks.

Happy affirming to you!

Frank Gjata

Founder Conscious Ink

Amanda Brown

Bold Action May Cause Shortness of Breath. Heart Palpitations. And Freedom Beyond Imagination.

Taking daring adventures doesn’t have to imply extreme sports like Bungee Jumping, or Sky Diving. To adventure daringly can also apply to taking bold action in our everyday lives, which perhaps can even feel scarier than jumping out of a plane at 10,000 ft.

What kind of action are we talking about here?

— Having that conversation you’ve been avoiding with your spouse or significant other.
— Facing something in your life you’ve been too scared to face because of the action you think it would require.
— Speaking up about something you’ve been pushing your feelings down about it.

Taking these kinds of actions takes true courage…courage even beyond facing physical fears.
But the rewards you may gain, and the elation you may feel upon completion will be extended beyond a runner’s high.

So, is there some bold action you’d be willing to take today?

If the answer is yes, congratulations! You will be in elite company. Just don’t be startled if you notice your heart pounding, adrenaline pumping, and the holding of your breath.

Take a moment. Enjoy a few deep breaths.

Ready? One, two, three…

Frank Gjata

Founder, Conscious Ink

Amanda Brown

5 Steps To Embracing The Now

How many times have you found yourself in a situation you didn't anticipate and also didn't welcome? Maybe an event you attended was not what you expected, a blind date wasn't what you anticipated, or a job you accepted didn't turn out to be exactly what you thought. How did you react/respond? Did you grin and bear it and count the minutes or did you find the door and get the heck out of dodge?

No judgment. No blame. We've been there!

But are you up for a challenge? A double dare perhaps? One that leads to a richer, more valuable experience.

We invite you to transform your perspective and approach this kind of situation differently in the future. Here's how:

1.) Bring awareness to your thoughts, and feelings. Acknowledge the unexpected situation at hand.

2.) Take a deep breath.

3.) Let go of what you expected the experience to be and be open to what experience wants to come through instead.

4.) Get comfortable with being uncomfortable. Express your experience if it feels safe to do so.

5.) Get curious. What is there to learn at the moment? What gift, perhaps not readily seen, is being presented to you?

6.) EMBRACE the challenge and be present for what is happening NOW!

Amanda Brown

"There's nothing to fear...That's it. End of quote."

FEAR. It's really quite comforting.

Crazy man say what???

Yep. The way I see it, fear is really more of a result than it is a cause (although it turns into a cause as well).

From my experience, fear is simply a result of feeling disconnected from who we really are. Plain and simple.

And it's no wonder we get scared. It's quite a scary feeling to be disconnected from the source of all things, truth, peace, freedom, power, beauty, and love. Terrifying really. We become little ol' frightened humans. Aww.

Not to worry though! We humans like to fight back don't we? Fear gets us all riled up. And, boy oh boy, do we humans have a lot of drama associated around fear. We want to destroy fear. Kick its ass. Conquer it. F#ck it. Chop it up into tiny itsy bitsy pieces. Holy mackerel!

Unless we're wrestling a lion with our bare hands, all we have to do is see fear for what it really is. A very sophisticated built-in alarm system, graciously warning us we've just become disconnected. It's not the real problem itself. In the same way a fire alarm is not the fire. Fear is our alarm. It's our disconnection that is our own personal fiery hell. (Of course, as we know, experiencing constant fear in our bodies can turn into a big problem unto itself...much worse than an irritating fire alarm going off constantly.)

When we see fear for what it really is, we don't have to do anything with IT at all. Sorry to be the fear party pooper. We just have to reconnect to who we really are. That's it. Big time saver. Big headache saver. Big stress saver. There's nothing to fear, but fear itself. Eh? Not really. Unless you have a strange fear of alarm systems or something. Even "disconnection" itself is nothing to fear, since we can never really be disconnected. We can only feel like we are. So I guess the revised quote should be, "There's nothing to fear..." That's it. End of quote.

As we reconnect to who we really are, any fear will disappear instantly. Guaranteed. It's actually an IMPOSSIBILITY to feel fear when we're connected to who we really are. That would be like Superman being scared of an everyday thug or a measly bullet or two. A big yawn.

So again, unless you're being chased by tigers, lions and bears...oh my!...follow these simple fear-eliminating instructions below:

Feel fear? Connect. Feel fear? Connect. Feel fear? Connect. Feel fear? Connect. Feel Fear? Connect. Feel fear? Connect.

Got it?

The scary, yet enlightening, thing that may also come to light is just how often we're in fear without even realizing it! Don't worry though. Things can shift quickly. Just remember, the next time you feel fear, there's no need to fight it. Just simply connect to who you really are...in whatever way that works best for you in that moment.

Examples of ways to connect? Acknowledging our truth in the moment (including the fear we're experiencing). Taking a breath. Being present with what is. Letting go. Dropping personas. Unconditional love and acceptance. Laughing. Openness to learning. Being vulnerable. Appreciation. Meditating. Doing what's joyful to us. Acting on our passion. Communing with nature. Connecting authentically with others. Some say chocolate. Who am I to argue? Add your favorites to the list.

Okay, I better wrap this up now. I'm afraid I may have taken up too much of your time. Oh crap...fear. Kidding!

Frank Gjata,

Founder Conscious Ink

Conscious Ink

4 Tips For Fostering A Mindful Student.

As the new school year greets us, many are struggling with anxiety and fears...for a number of reasons. This may be one of the most important times of the year to check in with our young people. It may be your own kids, a niece or nephew, or a grandchild, but now is the time to take stock of their tools to navigate our ever-changing educational landscape.

Mindfulness is one very important tool for their young toolbox.

Research shows that children who are more mindful and emotionally intelligent are more likely to succeed. Mindfulness gives them the tools they need to build confidence, cope with stress, and relate to uncomfortable or challenging moments. Other benefits are increased focus, improved academic performance, and decreased levels of stress. Some mindfulness tips and activities you can practice at home are:

1.) Ask a young person "Have you ever felt disappointed by something, or someone? " - this helps them get in touch with and identify their feelings and normalizes talking about them.

2.) Ask them "How did that make you feel?"

Listen to them, acknowledge their feelings, and if appropriate, talk about them. Help them understand it's healthy and normal to feel what they feel and how important it is to allow those feelings to move through us. This will help young people to articulate their emotions and be comfortable feeling what they feel.

3.) Then, say something like "Do you think there are times when you are disappointed, that you also have good things happening in your life, too? Let's come up with three good things together. This shows kids that they can feel more than one thing at a time AND that they have a choice of what to focus on.

4.) Another great thing to practice to promote habits of gratitude and thankfulness is going around the table at dinner time and having each person share 3 things they were grateful for that day.

Consistently practicing the above will help a child's mindfulness, emotional intelligence, and their ability to communicate. Check out some ink that will help your kids with the above when they are away from home :)

Amanda Brown

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